Mountains and molehills
Well I decided to get caught up on some housework today. I must have folded laundry for three hours and I am only maybe half done. You see, we make so much laundry at this point, that I need to do at least 3 loads a day. But I do not have time to fold it, at least that is not my time priority. So I bring it up out of the dryer and lay in out over the backs of the couches in the family room, thinking I will fold it when the next load comes out and I have a few minutes. And then I do it again. And again. And eventually what I have is a huge mountain of laundry waiting to be folded and who really has time to fold a mountain of laundry.
This method worked well when I used to watch tv. I would turn on my favourite shows after the kids went to bed and I would get my laundry from that day folded within the first show. Well this year I started spending way more time on the computer and far less time watching tv. Until it soon became my habit not to watch tv at all. Not a bad thing, I guess. I will go to bed early with a book, or stay up late reading blogs. But what I am not doing is folding laundry.
So today I did. Some of it even got put away! My 3 year old loves to help and he put all his own laundry away, yippee!
The only problem with him having drawers full of clean laundry is that he seemed to take that as meaning he had to wear every outfit in his drawers. Now he knows I would rather him keep the same outfit on all day if it is clean. So how did he justify 7 different pairs of pants today? I will tell you. He kept wetting his pants. And then running up to his room to change. And then saying, "I'm sowwy Mom," in the most pitiful little voice you ever heard. Aye!
What is with the apology thing anyway? He has been apologizing to me constantly, every time he does anything that could remotely be construed as wrong. My heart churns every time he does it.
He is very soft-hearted and sensitive, so I am very careful with how I speak to him and discipline. I have to use a quiet, even voice, and be extremely logical and reasonable. I can not raise my voice to him at all because it totally crushes his little heart. I am so careful not to, but he is still dancing around me like he thinks I am going to come down on him for something. I hate it! I feel like an ogre:) Lot's of times he is apologizing for things that I don't even get upset about, or think deserve any discipline at all. Like spilling something. If they spill I say that it is okay, why don't you help mommy clean it up. Or if he steps on my toe. I might yelp a little ouch, but then he over-apologizes, and I have to tell him I am fine, it is not a big deal, don't worry, stop apologizing.
Anyway, it is bothering me. I don't want him to do this, and I want to know why he is doing it. All the children are acting a little off with Daddy being away. Maybe it is just that. Or maybe I am still apologizing too much. Or maybe I did something that scared him, like yelling at his brothers. I don't know. Has anyone else dealt with an over apologizing child?
Oh! I got an awesome meme today from Don Mills Diva, so look for that later. Maybe on the weekend.
And, I am still not at 25000, I am just under 24 000, but I think I am going to bed. Too many late nights for the mama, it is stunting my growth. I will write tomorrow. And I will visit some of your blogs tomorrow hopefully, please forgive me for not getting to it tonight. I so tired.
adieu
This method worked well when I used to watch tv. I would turn on my favourite shows after the kids went to bed and I would get my laundry from that day folded within the first show. Well this year I started spending way more time on the computer and far less time watching tv. Until it soon became my habit not to watch tv at all. Not a bad thing, I guess. I will go to bed early with a book, or stay up late reading blogs. But what I am not doing is folding laundry.
So today I did. Some of it even got put away! My 3 year old loves to help and he put all his own laundry away, yippee!
The only problem with him having drawers full of clean laundry is that he seemed to take that as meaning he had to wear every outfit in his drawers. Now he knows I would rather him keep the same outfit on all day if it is clean. So how did he justify 7 different pairs of pants today? I will tell you. He kept wetting his pants. And then running up to his room to change. And then saying, "I'm sowwy Mom," in the most pitiful little voice you ever heard. Aye!
What is with the apology thing anyway? He has been apologizing to me constantly, every time he does anything that could remotely be construed as wrong. My heart churns every time he does it.
He is very soft-hearted and sensitive, so I am very careful with how I speak to him and discipline. I have to use a quiet, even voice, and be extremely logical and reasonable. I can not raise my voice to him at all because it totally crushes his little heart. I am so careful not to, but he is still dancing around me like he thinks I am going to come down on him for something. I hate it! I feel like an ogre:) Lot's of times he is apologizing for things that I don't even get upset about, or think deserve any discipline at all. Like spilling something. If they spill I say that it is okay, why don't you help mommy clean it up. Or if he steps on my toe. I might yelp a little ouch, but then he over-apologizes, and I have to tell him I am fine, it is not a big deal, don't worry, stop apologizing.
Anyway, it is bothering me. I don't want him to do this, and I want to know why he is doing it. All the children are acting a little off with Daddy being away. Maybe it is just that. Or maybe I am still apologizing too much. Or maybe I did something that scared him, like yelling at his brothers. I don't know. Has anyone else dealt with an over apologizing child?
Oh! I got an awesome meme today from Don Mills Diva, so look for that later. Maybe on the weekend.
And, I am still not at 25000, I am just under 24 000, but I think I am going to bed. Too many late nights for the mama, it is stunting my growth. I will write tomorrow. And I will visit some of your blogs tomorrow hopefully, please forgive me for not getting to it tonight. I so tired.
adieu
I HEAR you on the mountain of laundry. Every time I get to the bottom of the pile I vow, NEVER AGAIN will I let it pile up like that! It just never ends!
ReplyDeleteAh. laundry. the never ending saga. You have so many more children than I do though, lol! Nice to read your blog and catch up! Hope you're doing great...still scrapping?
ReplyDeleteHey another Lori D. that's cool. Anyways about the apology thing Noah does that too. I look at it as he is repeating what he hears us do so that is a good thing that we are considerate of each other.
ReplyDeleteHow to fix the laundry problem. What I did is we don't do dressers anymore. Right beside the washing machine and dryer I set up a wire basket system for the whole family, it goes right from the dryer into their baskets (each person has one for pants, one for shirts and one for pajamas, underwear and socks). This has also helped me to declutter clothes when they get too small or if they get too many (I am blessed with so many donations for Noah that I'm constantly going through and having to pass along to someone else). Anyways that was my solution, works great for me.
Gah! Mountains of laundry are apparently contagious! And apparently so are wet pants! Princess has taken to having "accidents" along with temper tantrums when she doesn't get her own way. Is it too early for someone to make me a cocktail?
ReplyDeleteI have a child who always apologizes, too. It used to worry me, I thought it was a sign of insecurity, but I really don't, anymore. I think he is just sensitive and more empathetic to other people's feelings, and that's why, if he feels he has somehow wronged someone, he wants to make them feel better about it.
ReplyDeleteAnd I do prefer it to a child who doesn't apologize at all! :)
Heidi
I have an over-apologizer! It is so hard not to feel like I am a monster. She is exactly how you described your son, only she's 10! She just apologizes and apologizes, even long after the event that she imagines she should be sorry for occurred. She cringes like she expects me to yell or hit her or something for the smallest things. She apologizes for insignificant things too. It drives me crazy! I don't have answers for you, only commiseration!
ReplyDeleteArgh on the peeing! I think it might be an almost 4 thing? Please make it stop!
ReplyDeleteAnd I think you have a wee boy who is very much like his mom:) You, my friend, are a definite over-apologizer!
And sorry about the dog. As you can read on my blog, it's all my sil's fault!
Love you,
Shay
PS. PLEASE COME WITH US!!! Sorry just sort of slipped out!
I love this blogging thing, it is always nice to hear that there are so many of us going through the same issues-thanks for commiserating with me guys!
ReplyDeleteand Shay, I so want to come, in fact I told dh last night that I was going (to gage his reaction cuz I had decided not to) and he told me that he was going to be working still then. the job was supposed to be over, wah!