Monday, March 17, 2014

Personality Plus

august 4, 2013

Sometimes my kids do things that are so 'them' that I feel like I need to record them and tell people so that they can see who my kids are, in the same way that I do. I often post them on Facebook, or record them in a notebook, or forget to get around to it at all. I used to write them all here, but it has been years since blogging has been a regular occurrence for me.

Earlier in the week, my wee Sunshine, who is now 2.75 years old, was sitting next to me as I checked Facebook. In my newsfeed there was a photo of huge rocks from a rock slide. He got very excited, jumped up and yelled, "Climb! Climb!" Of course he would want to climb those rocks. He never stops jumping and climbing. The first and last thing he does each day is convince someone to play catch with him. Footballs and frisbees fly morning, noon and night.
Immediately after the climbing excitement, he yelled, "1, 2, free, 4, 2... JUMP!" And leaped into my lap for cuddles and saying, "Murse Me, Mama!" Which is Sunshine for Nurse me, Mama. Because even extreme sport loving toddlers love nursies.

He is actually my latest nursling by far. Zed almost made it to 2 years, he quit just before Sunshine was born. I am more than ready for Sunny to be done. He needs a bit more convincing. Mostly he uses it as a delay tactic to avoid going to bed. Daddy comes in to put him to bed and he jumps at me, screaming, "MURSE!" hoping to grab a nip and get a few moments reprieve.

I am trying to distract him with more stories and cuddles, and hope to be done by his birthday. He is ready to be mostly a big boy too, I think.

Speaking of Zed, last night, after brushing his teeth, I mentioned to him that in about a year's time, he might get a wiggly tooth. I explained how it will fall out and the tooth fairy will pay him a visit, leaving her cash booty behind. He, being himself, told me that no, he will be keeping his tooth, thank you very much. He will leave a note for the tooth fairy and take his chances.

He is a boy who has his own, very distinct and specific way of doing everything. And he has a hard time making a decision and letting go. If he has 2 choices, he is all but paralyzed by indecision. What if he makes the wrong decision? And after he makes a decision, he almost always wishes he had made the other choice. If there are more choices? Well, forget about it. He has a meltdown.  So his not wanting to let go of his tooth? Not surprising to me.

Even better than those little things that they do that reinforce what I believe to be true about them, are the things they do that utterly shock me. I love finding out that I don't really know them as well as I think I do. It means that I still get to get to know them better.

Whole 30 check in, day 8

Doing a Whole 30 is a bit complicated with a house full of kids.
We have 6 children including 2 teenagers with their own income, who keep bringing junk food and such into the house. We didn't do a purge, so there are a number of tempting things like milk, cheese and peanut butter still in the house and being consumed by the kids on a daily basis. I am freaking out today, because I licked peanut butter off of my finger while making my kid a sandwich.
Do I need to start over???
We wanted to do a whole family Whole 30, but it was really stressful for the kids, so we are slowly introducing new foods and reducing the old ones and eliminating sugar. (I hope to wean them off the peanut butter by mixing it in ever decreasing amounts with almond butter)
Anyway, we are doing well, eating well and feeling okay. I have had some high energy days, unheard of for me, and I have had some really foggy, tired, sore days, like yesterday. We did have a lovely, long walk with the kids yesterday and saw the first Canada goose of the spring at the lake. Zed was 'observing and wondering,' he kept saying. And it was my husband's idea, so even better. He is really inspired to keep going, so that is an even bigger bonus. For the first few days, I felt like I was having to be a crutch for him, ensuring that he had lots of on plan food to eat, teaching him. But after a medical scare on Thursday and a cheaty look at the scale, he has taken the reigns for himself. Reading, prepping food, drinking coffee black. The whole 9 yards.

Thursday, March 13, 2014


My heart is so very full today. My newsfeed is full of photos and loving remembrances of a very special man in my life, my Uncle Oliver. He and my Auntie Joyce were like grandparents to me and my sisters, as our grandparents lived far away and Auntie and Uncle lived just around the corner. Uncle was always up for teasing and tickling when we were small and board games and jokes as we were older. Their home was filled with love and grandkids. Now they are finally reunited in heaven with many other of those who are precious to us, I know that Auntie is snuggling our Kalila and baby Grace each day and they are walking with their parents by a heavenly ocean. My heart aches for my dear cousins and their children and grandchildren, as well as for Uncle Oliver's dear wife who was his travel companion and friend and love and took such lovely care of him. I love you and miss you Uncle. And I love you, my sweet cousins. Your love, your close family ties, your philanthropy, your faith are all the greatest testimony of the lives of your parents and grandparents, Joyce and Oliver. I can't wait to see you all soon and share our memories.

Monday, March 10, 2014

Whole 30

This blog has always been about becoming the woman God wants me to be. About growth and change and appreciation and gratitude and the hard stuff and the joy. We have been doing the Saddleback church's Transformation study at church; we have been working on the Total Money Makeover, also at church; in my group of home educating friends, we have been working through The Twelve Steps: A Spiritual Journey; and my doctor had spoken to me in the fall about changing just one thing at a time in my physical health, as well as taking the time to do things that fulfill me as a person. Change is most definitely in the air.
I feel a bit like a cliché. I am almost 39 and looking at my life as a whole and wanting to live more deliberately, squeezing all the joy out that I can and to live beyond fear. But I think those are good things. I have been a stay at home mom for most of the last 20 years. Living out my purpose in my home. It is past time to push myself into being the best version of myself. And it is time to start expanding the boundaries of my life and reaching out to others more.
Anyhoo. One of the things that I am doing for my physical health is the Whole 30 program. 30 days of no sugar, no dairy, no grains or legumes. Just whole, nutrition dense foods. Meat, veg, fruit, seeds and nuts. My husband and I really needed to set the reset button on our food intake. Our sugar addictions were through the roof, we have both put on weight in the last couple years and I have never been so tired in my life. Exhaustion, headaches and muscle pain have been my constant companions for so long that I can't remember life before them.
So I am eliminating all the inflammatory foods, cutting out all sugar to stop the cravings, and hoping to see some change and at least see what foods are irritating me.
I am excited and afraid. Afraid of failure. Can I do this? Afraid of success. What will that mean? That I can't have any of my favourite things any more? Doomed to a life without cheese and chocolate?? I know that is silly. I am just making a choice. A choice to go without certain foods for a period of time, to see how that affects my body, my energy, my mood. The only thing I have to lose is pounds, pain and weariness. I don't HAVE to do anything. I get to choose. When the month is over, I will make more choices. And each day I will choose. What will I eat, how will I move, will I be thankful, will I be joyful? Choices.

Sunday, March 02, 2014

A love letter to my son.

March 2, 2014

A letter to my son.

My darling boy,

When I opened my bible reading for today, this was the second thing I read: Psalm 4
Evening Prayer of Trust in God.
Answer me when I call, O God of my rightesouness!
You have relieved me in my distress;
Be gracious to me and hear my prayer.
O sons of men, how long will my honor become a reproach?
How long will you love what is worthless and aim at deception?
But know that the Lord has set apart the godly man for Himself;
The Lord hears when I call to Him.
Tremble and do not sin;
Meditate in your heart upon your bed, and be still.
Offer the sacrifices of righteousness,
And trust in the Lord.
Many are saying, "Who will show us any good?"
Lift up the light of Your countenance upon us, O Lord!
You have put gladness in my heart,
More than when their grain and new wine abound.
In peace I will both lie down and sleep,
For You alone O Lord, make me to dwell in safety.

When I saw the verse, "How long will my honour be a reproach?" I thought of you and the hard time you have been given, because of your honour, your faith and your good choices. Some of the people you have been spending time with at school are like those who, " what is worthless and aim at deception." Their priorities and values are different than yours. Partying, drinking, etc. Even things that seem innocuous like music, video games, even food and exercies, but when they take the place of worship of God, those things become worthless.

Do all for the glory of Christ.
God has set you apart for himself.
He hears you when you call.
Meditate on him.
Look for him.
May his face shine upon you, may you know joy in his light.

God tells us over and over that if we seek him, we will find him. Look for him. He will prove himself to you. Do not get caught up in the lies and deceptions of this world. Ask Him to show you the truth. The truth of his love. He will not fail you. He will give you peace in your heart.