Friday, March 13, 2009

My Voice

As varied as are my reasons for blogging, are my reasons to not blog. One of the biggest being that I can`t find the space to use the bathroom by myself, never mind finding a half hour to write or the hour or two needed to keep up with my lovely blog friends. And I almost hate to write if I can't read and comment and email with you all.
Another thing that has been inhibiting me is how exposed I sometimes feel. It has become apparent to me that everyone I am acquainted with, reads my blog. It seems like every time I have a conversation with someone, I hear the words, "Oh, yeah, I read that on your blog!"
You did? I did not realize that you read my blog! You have never left a comment or anything!
And though I love that people read, I want them to know what is going on with us, it started to weird me out a little! Because this is mostly a journal, and having a relative stranger read your inner thoughts is one thing, having your family, friends and acquaintances read them is a whole other thing entirely.
So, I think I have reconciled that. I want to be transparent. I want people to really know me, and I think I have something to offer people through my experiences and my faith.
My last reason for my frequent blogging hiatuses(*?) is more problematic, but I think it is easily remedied. I often find it difficult to find my authentic voice when writing. I know that when something I have written resonates with people, it is because I am writing in my voice, from within, where the real me resides. It is when I can write just like I would talk to you if you were sitting write here beside me.
I am sure that no one reads my blog for my excellent grasp of grammar and editing. I know this because I never edit or worry about grammar, because I am writing just as I would speak to you. (And if I took the time to edit, I would never post a blessed thing.)
So I often want to blog, but don't, because my voice seems to be eluding me. And I hate just posting a list of happenings or what have you. If I can't write from a place of who I really am, then why bother?
How can I find my voice every time I try to write? How can I be consistent? Well, I think I have an idea. I need to write every day. I need to be consistent and then the words should flow more easily, don't you think? Writing is like anything else, you need to practice!
What about you? How do you find your voice? What keeps you blogging, day in and day out? Where do you find your inspiration? Inquiring minds NEED to know!

5 comments:

  1. I appreciate your honesty & it makes me feel better knowing that I am not the only person in the world who experiences some of the stuff that we've both been through. Your blog & your voice are a big part of what got me started writing my blog. :) I have issues with posting on a regular basis lately, too.
    Thank you for sharing yourself, my dear friend.

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  2. Those are all good questions, MMM. I wish I had good answers but I don't. I write when I have something to say and I don't when I don't.

    Which doesn't help at all.

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  3. My life keeps me blogging and allows me an out. But, I blog about everything...it's all over the place.


    And, I just found out my MIL reads my blog. I don't understand how you can read and not comment?!?

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  4. This is an excellent post and very timely for me as I've been feeling very much the same way. I love my homeschool blog as it does help me journal what we do and have a "record" of it - as well as family members feel "in touch" with what we do. I also have what I call my "personal space" blog which I had hoped was going to be a place that I could just spill my guts - unfortunately I don't feel so inclined to do so knowing others are reading it - yes I could make it private but it has offered me an outlet for "other stuff" that I don't share on my homeschool blog and personally the reason I would love to "spill my guts" is I guess I do want some kind of feedback about how I am feeling and dealing with "stuff" anyways this is too long but thanks for the food for thought - I'm looking forward to reading comments on this post. Lori D.

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  5. I totally relate to how you feel. Funny how different we write when we know the people reading our blog. I fed my blog into my facebook but took it down when I started getting more friends on facebook. I have never wrote anything nasty about anyone, I just knew that it would affect my writing. I am an open honest person, but for some reason this would have bothered me

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