Well I had my Doctor's appointment this morning and baby is well and growing fine. But I did learn that, as I had suspected, my placenta is now completely covering the opening to the uterus. So I officially have placenta praevia and am now considered a 'High Risk' pregnancy.
I assumed that when I was given that diagnosis, I wouldn't really be shocked or upset, and for a few moments I wasn't.
The first thing the doctor told me was 'absolutely no sex', and I was like - seriously? And yep she was totally serious. They don't even do internal exams because you don't want to disturb the cervix in any way. Okay. I can deal with that. We talked about the likelihood of having a cesarean if the placenta doesn't move away from the cervix. I knew about that already and it didn't faze me. And then she started talking about the catastrophic effects that a bleed could result in and then the tears started.
I know that the likelihood of everything being just fine is almost a definite. The placenta even has lots of time to move up still as my uterus grows. (I am only 23 weeks) I also know that all the worrying in the world won't make anything the least bit better, it is out of my hands. But I am still feeling a bit out of sorts, a bit frightened by the possibilities. I know what it is to be on the wrong side of statistics. 1 in 100 chance of something going wrong, doesn't sound so good to me anymore. With Kalila I had a 1 in 200 chance of something being wrong and she died. Odds are not comforting to me.
Tomorrow I will be back to being optimistic and assured that all will be okay, already I have been able to continually keep letting go of my fears and give them to God. Because I know that whatever happens, He will be holding me in His arms, carrying me through, just as He always has.
My doctor was very concerned that I am a stay at home mom with 4 kids. She told me that if I worked she would put me on leave, but I don't get leave from being a mom. She kept stressing the need for me to take it easy, not take it easy compared to my normal life, but TAKE IT EASY. She wanted to know what kind of help I can get at home etc.
I am not really sure how to incorporate 'taking it easy' into my life. So I won't be helping my hubby move 2 tonne loads on a hoist across the driveway again like I did last week. (scary to me now!) I won't help with the renovations, I will even get someone else to haul the laundry up and down the stairs. But what about picking up my preschoolers? My daughter is still in a crib and needs help getting in her carseat. My 4 year old loves me to carry him to bed and now I have to explain to him that I am not allowed to do that anymore. I guess we will figure all that stuff out, in the grand scheme of things that is all small stuff.
I can't tell you how relieved I was to hear that baby is fine and growing, in fact, baby is measuring a week ahead right now. This is good, because when the placenta is low it doesn't get as optimum nourishment as it does in the blood rich top of the uterus. So later in the pregnancy it can affect baby's growth. I had been a bit concerned about baby's heart as the tech spent so much time looking at it and in the previous u/s they couldn't see it properly. But its heart looks perfect.
So I realize that all of this is fairly common and usually all is well, right now I am just processing all the new developments and how they affect my life and my near future. And praying that all will be well.