Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Huh?

Ack, my internet has been down for the last day or so, I can't believe how much I missed it last night. No blogging, no blog surfing, no email... I feel so disconnected...
But it's back, maybe they have fixed some of the issues we have been having, that would be nice. Maybe I will be able to upload pictures again!
I just noticed that I am almost at 300 posts now, wow, I hadn't realized I was on here so much. I think there are a number of entries that are just drafts though. Lots of times I start to write and then feel like I have nothing to say and I just close it. Like today. I have so much to do tonight and it is already 9pm.
I have been feeling extremely overwhelmed, I can't seem to get on top of things. I guess I am trying to do too many things and none of them are getting done well. My house is a shambles almost all the time. My dirty laundry pile is almost as large as my pile of laundry that needs folding. I did make a nutritious meal tonight, but I am now out of produce and milk. Again.
School is happening though. I am even on top of my marking, mostly. I am doing it with them each day, so that works much better. I was so frustrated yesterday with trying to get the boys to stay on task that I ran upstairs to my room to cry. I cried so hard that I now have broken blood vessels under my eyes. Hormones much?
When I put the boys to bed last night, I was still crying (dh and I were arguing as well...) but after we prayed together and I sang Away in a Manger to them (as I have for 14 years now), I told them that I was sorry that we had such a bad day. I then told them that tomorrow is a new day, a fresh start for all of us.
Today we were done school at 11:30 am instead of 4 pm. We did the exact same amount of work. But in the amount of time it should actually take! We even spent some time after lunch doing science, which we hadn't had time to get to for a few days. My 10 year old told me, "Mom, you were right! It is a new day!" He was proud of himself, and I was proud too and extremely thankful. We had a completely different house today.

Dh has decided to sell off his business for now, take a break from the stress and just relax a bit with our family. Today we said good bye to his big truck. I think we were all a bit sad to see it go, my driveway looks so empty now. But it is a good thing. Who can afford to fuel up a monster like that anymore anyway? We are going to replace it with a little car for driving to work, and I can't wait until we do. I hate having to share a vehicle, I am terribly spoiled!

I got to go spend some time with other women tonight to hear about an 'opportunity'. I didn't care what it was for, there were other women there and snacks. I was so gonna be there! The next two days I am really motivated to get school done in the mornings because I have coffee dates in the afternoons with girlfriends. I have been so lonesome that last 2 weeks because no one was going out of their houses with the awful snowstorms we had. I am so thankful that God has sent me some beautiful women to fill my life with support and love and friendship.

Okay, I am done rambling on, I don't think this could have been any more scattered and random. I apologize, I needed the cathartic release. Off to do my homework now.

12 comments:

  1. I'm glad you had such a good school day to follow the bad one, and that the boys recognized that, too. Maybe, eventually, they'll realize that by buckling down, you get through it all sooner :)

    Enjoy your coffee dates!

    Heidi

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  2. It's the good days that fill me up and make me realize that everyday can be a good day, and even if it's not, that's ok, because yesterday was and tomorrow can be again! hang in there! I'm glad you are getting some girlie time out of the house...we all need that!

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  3. I didn't know you had snowstorms recently. Is it getting warmer now?

    So what is your hubby going to do after he sells off the business?

    You're right about the gas prices...it has been about 3.70 here for over a week. Arggg!!!! I keep putting 5 gallons in, hoping it will go down a little by the time I need to buy again, but instead it goes up and my stupid gas light keeps going on. So it's annoying and maddening! It makes me think we shouldn't go anywhere, but then we get depressed staying in the house...it's a vicious cycle.

    I'm sorry you've had such a time with school and your house and...well, life. It's hard to keep up, isn't it? I feel for you. But I'm glad you're having a new day.

    Well, TTYS, Kristen! Sniz

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  4. Sorry you had such a bad day, but I'm glad a really good day followed it. Hope you have a great time with your friends!

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  5. Nothing lasts forever. That is the lesson here. Kids have a hard time predicting the future, but we can do it for them. And now you wll have an example.."It will get better remember that day when????"
    I hope you have a whole bunch of triumphs right in a row...

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  6. That must be hard work being able to be there as teacher and mom for your kids. I admire the way you are able to handle that on a daily basis.

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  7. Aw, Sweetie, it sounds like you're having a really tough time right now. And I want you to know that I'm here for you. Seriously, I am.

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  8. Wish I could give you a big hug. Glad this was a better day for you!

    I got a chuckle out of your comment about other women and snacks. So true!

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  9. WOW! Congrats. 300 is a big number. A lot of words!!!

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  10. I understand about the 'girls' night thing. It's just nice to be in the presence of women some times- the only ones that truly understand what it means to be a wife/mom.

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  11. hugs! I'm glad the boys had a better day today...yay!
    You're still doing better than me as I"m still trying to get the get up and go to even write my blog. That last entry just taunts me every time!

    Did you have a fun evening?

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  12. Sorry you had such a rough day. Sounds like your husband's business stress has been hard on you - hope lots more good days are in your future...

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