Monday, May 04, 2009

Warning, teary rant ahead.



I am trying really hard not to burst into tears. I am actually in the middle of cleaning my fridge, so I shouldn't be stopping to write while my groceries sit on the counter getting warm, but UGH!
My hubby has been working up north for about 10 weeks now. It was supposed to be a couple of weeks. And then they promised him a position here in town for a while. A few weeks came and went, and then a few more. The past week or two it looked like there was a light at the end of the tunnel. His new job starts on the 10th they told him. May tenth he would start working a half an hour away rather than 5 or 6 hours away. They said he would have some time off beforehand. He should have been done by today and on his way home to me now.
No. They told him to take a few days off and come back to finish up. Then they want him to start work on another unit up there. What???
He is supposed to be on his way home. For good. Job over.
I am tired. I am done. I held on this far, with the hope of his return this week and now that may be ripped from my hands. I don't want to wait a few more weeks. I want him home now. I don't even want to wait a few more days.
I guess it should be a positive that they want him to stay. He is very good at what he does. He has special skills that no one else up there right now has. They need his skills. But I need him too. I just need a soft place to land at the end of the day, is that too much to ask?

He told them no. He said he would finish what he was working on and they he was coming home. But it is hard, because they hold the keys to the next job. And we can't afford for him to not be employed right now. I guess all I can do is to give it to God.



  1. Oh babe, I'm sorry. You've been SO tough - you have earned the right to complain a little. You've actually earned the right to throw yourself on the floor and kick if you'd like to. I can barely make it to 5:30 without complaining, and that's with just 2 kids. I can't even imagine.

    And God is more than big enough to put up with your whining. It doesn't change who He is or what He can do in the slightest. Hang in there. :)

  2. I think you're amazing. I struggle through my day most days, and that is with a husband who comes home by 5pm each day and helps out a LOT - I have older who help a LOT and I don't have a new baby - yet I still struggle with homeschooling just two of mine, running a home and my 5 children!! So I have NO clue how you do it :)

    Give yourself a high five for coping this long - I would have been in a ball in the corner somewhere and social services would have taken my children I'm sure ;)

    Just remember:

    "And this too shall pass..."


  3. Aww honey. I hope that he's home with his arms wrapped tightly around you soon soon soon. You're amazing to have held on so long, and I know that whatever happens you'll rise to the challenge. (Though I hope the only challenge left is a pedicure and a latte!)

  4. I like how you put into words your reason for wanting him home. It really helped me understand why it is that my wife often interrupts me when I call her on the way home from work with the same question every time--"When are you going to be home?"

    I'm her "soft place to land at the end of the day."

  5. I'm so sorry. What a rough place to be in. I hope it all ends up working out soon. Good luck!

  6. Oh honey....I hope his ultimate NO, lands him his job where you all deserve it!!

  7. You know...I think I've said this many times...I don't know how you do it all by yourself...I'm certain (beyond positively certain) that I would be in tears DAILY.

    Hang in there. I think you're doing a great job. ;)

  8. You are amazing.
    You may throw fits.
    You may throw things.
    You may feel like giving up.
    But, somehow you don't & you just get through it.
    I hope it all works out, and keep us posted.

  9. That is NOT fun :(

    My hubby worked as a consultant for 6 weeks which took him down to the States and away from his family. I understand about needing a soft landing. And I only had one kiddo. You continue to amaze me!!!

    I think a mid-fridge fit is absolutely warranted. My thoughts are with you both!!

    Hugs to you

  10. Oh how frustrating! And hard. I think I might lose it too. Nothing is ever easy, is it.

  11. I'm throwing my flabby arms around you, MMM. I'm sorry. I understand and I'm sorry.

  12. I'm so sorry. I know it's tough. I'm sending tons of hugs your way.

  13. Aw sweetie! I so understand. I wish I was there and could come and help.
    Maybe you should just pack everyone up and come to me. We could let the kids run crazy in my yard while you and I bake and talk and do whatever, just like old times.

    I'm praying:)